Rich Litvin

If YOU have a Goal that seems IMPOSSIBLE...

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email me: rich [at] thatconfidenceguy.com



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Listen To My Radio Interview How to Build Lasting, Deep Natural Confidence

“I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People.”

You arrogant bastard!
I know. I heard you say it.
Even if it was just inside your head.

Go on.
What else do you want to say?

How do you know?
What makes you so special?
And if you need to say that then you can’t be confident, can you?!

Good questions. I’m glad you asked.
Let me answer them all.

How do you know you’re so confident, Rich?

I know I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People because I’m writing the bestselling book “Secrets of The World’s Most Confident People” and I have spent the past 6 months traveling the world, meeting some amazing people.

Great. What does that have to do with your confidence?

Patience. Give me a moment longer. I’m getting to it, I promise.

Now you may have already seen this on the home page but let me just share with you a little about the people I have met…

What if I told you about the modern-day James Bond who said he knew he was confident the first time he stole a Billion Dollars? Or how about the High School Dropout who was a model, a celibate Buddhist monk for 7 years, a geisha trainee and dated Bill Gates. And who now consults at the White House and has personally helped 150 people become Millionaires.

Or how about three New York Times bestselling authors who are regular guests on Oprah; the World’s Leading Hypnotist; one of the Most Influential & Powerful Women in Social Media or the Creator of a Website with Two Million Visitors a month?

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Or the woman who went from being a secretary to an Internationally Known Psychic; the Mother of Two who Founded a Charity and Influences Governments; the Success Coach who works with Royalty and Hollywood Stars; the World’s Greatest Seducer and three of the Most Sexually Confident Women you’ll ever meet…

OK. They sound like interesting people but how do you claim to be so confident?

Ok. Ok. I promised I’d answer your questions. And I will.

How do I know I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People? Well, the first thing I noticed when I called these amazing people to set up an interview was that the most common reply was, sure I’d love to do the interview but I’m probably not as confident as you think I am…

Hmm… strange, I thought. I know that feeling. People sometimes think I’m confident. But it often doesn’t feel like that in the inside.

Then the next thing I noticed was that most of these people would tell me that they were very confident in some areas of their lives. And not in others. For example, the male porn star who told me he needed my help in meeting women! And the senior executive in a Fortune 100 company who dealt with billions of dollars every day but was terrified about losing his own money.

And then I noticed that there were people like the world-class martial artist who used to be terrible at martial arts (I know – he’s a buddy of mine and 15 years ago I used to routinely beat him when sparring). The difference is, he kept training, week in, week out for 15 years. And he’s now about to take his 3rd dan black belt in one of the most challenging martial arts in the world.

And then I began to hang out with these people. Some had been on Oprah. Some were making millions of dollars. Some worked with Presidents and Prime Ministers. And one worked with CIA and KGB agents!

And you know what was strange?

They were all pretty ordinary people.

Ok. Some were really fascinating and I couldn’t stop asking them questions. But to be frank, some bored the shit out of me.

Some were attractive. Some were not. Some were confident as little kids. And some had childhoods that were excruciating because their self-esteem was so low. Some hung out with celebrities and were still excited about that. And some were celebrities and weren’t even aware of it.


What makes you so special?

Good question.
That’s the cool part.
Nothing.

I put my pants on one leg at a time. Just like you. (I’m assuming you wear pants, right?)

There are times in my life when I feel confident.
Hanging out with friends. Playing with my nephews. Working with clients. And spending time with my wife.

And there are times in my life when I totally lack confidence. Walking into a party. Holding a new born baby. Talking to an audience of more than a thousand people. And spending time with my wife!

I recently had a conversation with a Success Coach who works with Hollywood Stars and Royalty. He shared a story about Bruce Springsteen, who was asked in an interview,

“Are you ever nervous before you perform on stage in front of 50,000 people?”

His reply was simply, “No.”

The interviewer was incredulous and said, “Really?! Well, what happens before you go on stage?”

“Well,” he replied, “my heart starts to thump really hard in my chest, my palms get clammy, my
face gets hot and sweat drips down the side of my face… And I know I’m pumped and ready to go on stage…”

bruce-live1

I love that story. In my business its called a re-frame. And it reminds me that so I often I compare how I am feeling on the inside with how other people look on the outside.


>> What if you knew that everyone who has successfully started a new business, earned a black belt in martial arts, become a movie star, spoken on stage to thousands of people or made millions of dollars experienced everything that YOU experience?


>> What if you knew that the steps they took to build their confidence could be learned?

>> And what if you knew that everything they have done is possible for YOU, too?

I’m here to tell you that everything they have done is possible for YOU.

And if you are still thinking, no… Not me. Then let me tell you that just four years ago I was fired from my job.

I was almost at the pinnacle of success in my profession. I had recently bought my dream home (a three story town house in London). I had my dream car – a convertible. And then in an instant my self-esteem plummeted to rock bottom.

I SO know what people are going through right now as I read the headlines about the people who are being laid off on a daily basis. I felt devastated, angry and ashamed.

It took me three days before I could even bring myself to tell my parents what had happened. And even then, I tried to make t sound like it was some kind of voluntary thing that would be good for my career!

It took me over three months of being unemployed to notice that I was still referring to myself by the job title I used to have! It then took another three months of being unemployed to actually stop using that old job title.

I’ve done some crazy things in the past four years. I sold my dream home and my dream car and left England for good. I lived on a beach in Thailand. I proposed to a woman I met 10 days earlier. I lived in India, the United States and China and I traveled the world for a year with my fiancé. I apprenticed with the best coaches in the world. And I created a business where I can do what I love from anywhere on the globe (I’m writing this article in Singapore and tomorrow I fly to Thailand).

Now finally. You see, I haven’t forgotten. You asked:
And if you need to say that then you can’t be confident, can you?!

Well, it actually took a lot of balls to begin this article with the words, “I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People”.

But that’s part of the point. You see confident people have all the same fears and concerns as the rest of us. They just take action anyway.

People ask to work with me because they want more confidence.

What I know is this:

Confidence doesn’t exist.

At least not in the way that people often want it.

You see, “Confidence is a result of action. Not a requirement for action.”

Nike got it right. JUST DO IT.
And if you need some support. That’s fine too.

I only wrote this article because I just spent an hour on the phone with one of my mentors! I wasn’t sure what to write. I was wrestling with the question what if they don’t like it. And I was scared of putting myself out there.

He said just do it.
And I did…

I started this article with the words, “I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People.”

I’m gonna finish it with the words,YOU are one of The World’s Most Confident People…”

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6 Responses to ““I’m one of The World’s Most Confident People.””

  • Miz BoheMia says:

    Wow Rich… I loved this entry… and yes, I didn’t get it in the beginning when you so easily declared yourself to be confident… and now as I read this and get it and think back on my life I think, “Fuck! I am confident? I am confident!” Who knew?

    It puts some recent experiences that I leaped into, that made me feel like just choking on the nausea that formed within, that didn’t go as planned to boot but now? Damn… no regrets at all and for that I thank you. I plan to make the world my playground… and 5 minutes later I may be back to feeling scared shitless but that’s ok…

    Thank you my friend…

    I also read “I am in Pain”… you know I understand that all too well and my heart goes out to you both… all my love…

  • Rich says:

    Hey Miz BoheMia – I subscribe to the wonderful line “its better to regret the things you HAVE done in life, than to regret the things you HAVEN’T done…”

    I am learning that ‘natural confidence’ is feeling nervous (even feeling scared shitless) and doing what you really want to do, ANYWAY…

    Thanks for the love. Back atcha!

    Rich

  • Tina says:

    Hi ya Rich,
    So cool…yup we are all confident…we need to as you say ‘Fear it and take action anyway’.. Its like we talked. Screw-up as much as you can and you can do anything after that. My words to you today. Thanks for your inspiration!

  • Rich says:

    Tina,
    “Screw-up as much as you can and you can do anything after that…” – wow, those ARE inspiring words! Thank you.

  • Kiz says:

    Great worrk!

  • runa says:

    so so true, is a simple concept to just do it but still takes guts i always thought i had zero confidence but now i realise that confidence doesnt equal fearless quite the contrary in fact.

    Thank u Rich you have enlightened me and so enriched my life and experience!

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